Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting Burmese-style with my hands on my knees.

Experience: I closed my eyes and immediately perceived my visual field "vibrating" at about eight times per second. Concentration was intense and focused. Sense input was clearly discernible as arising from nothing, existing, then vanishing utterly. Background mental processes were objects just as equally as more standard objects like sight and touch.  
"Formations" were evident. I tried to clearly discern the either "Not-Self, Impermanence, or Unsatisfactoriness" in each sense-input. I would seem to sort of "fall" into one or another of the  "Three Characteristics" of a given sense-input, there were would be a *blip* of no thought/feeling/memory, then I would come out wondering what just happened. Then physical discomfort and diffuse concentration would be evident, moving swiftly into an "Equanimity-like" territory, then another "fall" in a "Characteristic" . . . repeat, repeat, repeat. End of session.



Observations: I'm super tired. I don't know why, but I am. The blips from this session felt a lot like "Fruitions" to me - on the other hand, I know I could be deceiving myself into thinking that dozing off or spacing out are "Fruitions". That said . . . I know its only been a week or so since I dropped out of "Review" from "First Path" . . . but could I now be in "Review" on "Second Path"? That seems absurdly fast. I guess time will tell.

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