Friday, December 30, 2011

Time: 25 minutes

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, half lotus.

Experience: It took longer than usual to really "get with" my breath - maybe five or ten minutes. Once I had Access Concentration I shifted my attention to the sensation of pressure between my eyes and tried to stay with that. There were pulses of pleasure through my body, but not at the usual volume. After a while I experienced a few blossoms of light behind my eyes and my sense of calm increased. My ability to focus and follow the birth and death of thoughts increased beyond what it was when the session started - but nothing earth shattering.

Observations: Maybe the problem is that I was looking for something "earth shattering." This session was characterized by a lot of wandering attention - I couldn't really seem to focus tightly on the object; it was always slipping away like it was coated in soap or grease. Thoughts would arise and I would get sucked into their content for a beat or two before tuning into their existence and watching them themselves. Even when I did spot a thought arise my observation of it was slower than usual and my focus had a dull quality to it that usually isn't there.

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