Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting in a couch with my hands on my knees.

Experience:  Awareness settled on touch-sense. Touch-sensations arose and passed at a rate of about 6/second. Concentration and equanimity were both pretty low. I reminded myself of what the Three Characteristics are and to observe the arbitrary labeling of sensations as "self". Awareness was subsumed by a series of stories. Sensations had a rough quality to them. Intense flickering white light. Concentration was much more refined immediately. Equanimity was still low - but there was a new "flavor" to the low equanimity; whereas before it was more of a "Jeez, these sensations feel rough!" now it was more of a "I feel really emotionally raw" sort of flavor. Physical discomfort, pain, and fear arose, then faded into the background; they were still there, and happening, and "unpleasant" but their immediacy was gone. They were just occurring, just sensations, like any others. There was still and "rough" quality to experience, but it was less disconcerting for some reason. This very realization seemed to refine experience even further. The process of labeling sensations as "me" was apparent. Time appeared to pass. The session ended, which was a little sad, but oh well.
 
Observations:  N/A.

45 minutes. Sitting in a quiet room with my eyes closed and my hands in my knees. Awareness settled on sensations presenting at the Touch Door. Concentration and equanimity were 4/10. Sensations arose and passed @ 6/sec. Reminded myself what the 3Cs are and to watch the arbitrary labeling of sensations as Self. Fell into several stories. Sensations arose and passed @ 10/sec. Sensations associated with fear, loathing, sadness, etc arose and passed.  Immaterial jhanas were "out there". Did not solidify them. Rarified space of high concentration/equanimity. Story. More unpleasant emotion-sensations and difficulty concentrating. Then high concentration/equanimity. Then back down. Then back up.session ended. 

Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting in a chair with my hands on my knees.

Experience:  Awareness settled on touch-sense. Touch-sensations arose and passed at a rate of about 8 times per second. Concentration and equanimity were both low. I reminded myself of what the Three Characteristics and to "trace" the process of selfing to the precipitating physical sensation. I observed sensations arise and pass. I fell into a little story. When I popped out concentration and equanimity were moderate. Sensations were arising and passing at more like 12 times per second. There was fear and anxiety. There was physical discomfort. There was aversion. I fell into another story. When I popped-out concentration and equanimity were moderate to high. Mind-sensations were objects just like physical sensations. The process of assigning a sense of self to sensations was occurring and observed as it was. I fell into a story. When I popped-out, concentration and equanimity were high. Sensations arose and passed with incredible speed. Each moment contained data from all sense-doors at once. I fell into a story again. Then pain and aversion. Then no aversion - pain was just there, nothing more. Then rapid arising and passing. More moments containing all available data. End of session.
 
Observations:  I've been neglecting this blog lately. Its a dangerous habit to get into. This blog keeps me honest about making sure I meditate. I plan on being more diligent in the future.

Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting in a chair with my hands on my knees.

Experience:  Awareness settled on touch-sense. Touch-sensations arose and passed at a rate of about 6 or 8 per second. Awareness shifted to sight-sense; these sensations were also arising and passing at about the same rate. Concentration and equanimity were high. I reminded myself of what the Three Characteristics are and that if it is observable, it isn't me. I observed sensations arise and pass. I fell into a little story. When I popped out concentration and equanimity were very high. Sensations were arising and passing at more like 12 or 14 times per second. Mind-sensations were objects just like physical sensations. Visual sensations were almost hallucinogenic - lots of swirling, pulsing, colors and shapes. The process of assigning a sense of self to sensations was not very active, but was obvious when it occurred. The physical sensations that usually (immediately) precede "strong" mind-sensations like anger and sadness arose and passed and were clearly just physical sensations. There was some slight body-twisting and other posture issues. Then a story. Then more sensations. Then more sight-sensations. Then a story. And on and on. A few times in the session there was aversion and there was pain, but its hard to say at what "point" in the session these occurred. Ding ding.
 
Observations: This was one of those sessions where I felt really "submerged" and when it ended it was like coming up for air after diving deep into a body of water.

Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting in a chair with my hands on my knees.

Experience:  Awareness settled on touch-sense. Touch-sensations arose and passed at an increasing rate from perhaps 8 times per second up to around 16 times per second. The happened over the course of about 30 seconds. Awareness shifted to sight-sense; these sensations were also arising and passing at around 16 times per second. Concentration and equanimity were high. I reminded myself of what the Three Characteristics are and that if it is observable, it isn't me. I observed sensations arise and pass. I fell into a little story. When I popped out concentration and equanimity were very high. Mind-sensations were objects just like physical sensations. The process of assigning a sense of self to sensations was obvious. The physical sensations that usually (immediately) precede "strong" mind-sensations like anger and sadness arose and passed and were clearly just physical sensations. The mind did not assign a mind-sensation to them like anger or sadness, awareness just recognized that, for example, the tension and heat in my upper chest and tightening of the temple-muscles that usually precedes an "anger-sensation" in the mind was arising, and then observed it pass. That was all. A few light shows. Some body-twisting. Then a story. Then more physical sensations that usually precede "strong" mind-sensations. More observation of them arising and passing. Lather, rinse, repeat. End of session.

Observations: Coolio, Yo.

Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting in a chair with my hands on my knees.

Experience:  Awareness settled on touch-sense. Touch-sensations arose and passed around 12 times per second. Awareness shifted to sight-sense; those sensations arose and passed at 12 times per second as well. Concentration and equanimity were low. I reminded myself of what the Three Characteristics are. Mind-sensations were difficult to observe as not "me", just a sixth category of sensation. I fell into a series of stories. After maybe four or five stories, the speed of sensations quickened to around 18 times per second, and the character of sensations smoothed-out a bit. There was physical pain. There was aversion to pain and to meditating. I wanted to stop meditating. I continued to meditate. Equanimity increased. Realization: "I" was not the cause of perceiving sensations, sensations were perceived without "me", and that to the extent there was a "me", it was just a part of the moment of perceiving. Not-self came to the fore. Mind-sensations were just sensations. White light. An almost physical "clunk" of awareness doing something. More pain. More aversion. Less equanimity. Less concentration. Then less pain and aversion and more concentration and equanimity. A kind of cycling between these. The timer went off. I was startled.

Observations: N/A.

Time: 45 minutes.

Situation: A quiet room with my eyes closed, sitting in a chair with my hands on my knees.

Experience:  Awareness settled on touch-sense. Touch-sensations arose and passed at about 8 or 10 times per second. Concentration and equanimity were moderate to high. I reminded myself of what the Three Characteristics are. Mind-sensations were observable as sensations just like any of the five physical sensations. Sensations were very much not "me", they were just sensations in whatever moment they were "doing their thing" in, and then, of course, they passed away.  Awareness entered a story. When it popped out, the rate of arising and passing of sensations had increased quite a bit, if I had to guess: ballpark 25 times per second. The character of the arising and passing was smooth and fine, but the periods of "nothingness" between one sensation passing and the next arising were very discrete and perceptable, despite the speed involved. The body began to twist and tilt for some reason. Proprioception was off and there was some physical pain the lower back and shoulders. It was difficult to tell whether I was sitting in a normal upright position or not. Awareness entered another story. When it popped out, sensations were arising and passing just as fast as when awareness entered the story, but the pain and proprioception/twisting issues were gone. Continued observation of sensations arising and passing. The alarm beeped. This session did not feel long, but it didn't feel like the blink of an eye either. 

Observations: N/A.